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Caramel Apples: Ever wondered what it means to be too stupid to live?

October 14, 2006

I’m going to share with you my laugh for the day. I even had to tell Josh this one because it’s just amazing someone is so utterly…dumb.

One of my favorite sites is www.allrecipes.com and I was researching Halloween recipes today. On the site, they were featuring a simple caramel apple recipe. I’m pasting it below:

Caramel Apples
Submitted by: Suzie
Prep Time: 8 Minutes
Cook Time: 2 Minutes Ready In: 25 Minutes
Yields: 6 servings

“Red apples on sticks, bathed in gooey caramel. Halloween delight. (You will need 6 wooden craft sticks for this recipe.)”

INGREDIENTS:
6 apples
1 (14 ounce) package
individually wrapped caramels, unwrapped
2 tablespoons milk

DIRECTIONS:
1. Remove the stem from each apple and press a craft stick into the top. Butter a baking sheet.
2. Place caramels and milk in a microwave safe bowl, and microwave 2 minutes, stirring once. Allow to cool briefly.
3. Roll each apple quickly in caramel sauce until well coated. Place on prepared sheet to set.

Easy enough, right? I mean, how do you screw that up? Well, I always read the reviews of the recipes because sometimes people have neat tips or modifications to the recipes that make it better or easier. So imagine my…shock when I read the below, ONE STAR review (all the other 31 reviews were 5 stars):

The idiot that submitted this recipe says to use caramels. However, they failed to mention that you are supposed to use CARAMEL CHEWS, NOT caramel candies such as werthers!!!!!! Extremely important. Due to the incompetence of this recipe, our apples were ruined needless to say, and it was a total waste of our time and money. if you plan to make them- use caramel CHEWS!!! (Soft candy) not the caramels that are hard. The incompetent person that submitted this recipe probably caused many to create the wrong recipe- using the caramel hard candy!

Bwahahahaha…can’t…breathe…

I think there are some appropriate smilies for this person. Feel free to use them in the comments.

All recipes at a glance: